i'm still up

so, it's 204am and i'm still awake to the irritation of my exhausted cat who i keep moving, unintentionally, every time i move. but really, it's not all my fault. i can't sleep per the manifestation of universal energy. first i was watching angel, season 1, and it was awesome. i just watched episode 5 where cordelia moves into a house haunted by a killer ghost mommy. then i started reading vandwelling and camping blogs. i started with some girl who takes awesome pics but her blog was too freaking complicated for me. if i have to work that hard to understand, i need it reflected in my gpa.

then i went to 721 and the truck house blog. he reminds me a lot of myself. so much so that while reading 721 i thought the blogger was a guy, especially since i ran across truck house sometime last year, i think, and remembered a picture of a guy; but then there were some parts i really wasn't sure. i was like, ok, maybe cool lesbian, which i have no problem with. not only am i an advocate of sexual freedom, i publicly endorse the coming out or experimentation of any female who thinks she might, in some way, have lesbian tendency. =D i fight for equal rights and reduce the eligible straight female to male ratio in my favor. what's not to like?  but then i scanned truck blog again and, true enough, he is a guy. he's just a guy in touch with his feelings who freely expresses his emotions. first, i didn't know guys had emotions like that. so many of the guys i've known have been of the not-nice variety that i just didn't think they went that deep. second, i admire his courage. i don't have it. unless someone chops off one of my body parts - well loved and cherished i might add - or i suddently decide medication is just a scam of the pharmaceutical industry to keep us enslaved in their matrix-like psychological conglomerate -  which has happened so i'm not doubting it - i don't cry. i don't cry in public, i don't cry with friends, i don't cry when drunk. i try to limit my reachable emotions to lust, love, happiness, joy, humor, concern, anger, rage, annoyance, sarcasm, and despair. if you notice, sadness and depression, not so much. but still, i may have them on layaway somewhere and have just forgotten to pick them up. therefore if i go that way, and then have a mental hiccup and post about it, just consider it bill paid and remind me that "the sun will come out, tomorrow, so i just gotta hang onto tomorrow, come what may...." lol.

now, back to reading random, vandwelling-related blogs with the peace of mind that comes from knowing my alarm is set to wake me up no later than 12:00 for my 130pm (that's 1330 to you military types) window-tinting $60 appointment later today, since i have been known to sleep till 330pm (yes, you read it correctly 1530).

nitey nite.